|Us in high school|
This past week, I have been reflecting on our marriage. It certainly hasn't always been roses and walks in the park, but it has always been rewarding. We have made it through times of unemployment, financial struggles, personality conflicts, and a number of other struggles. We have worked, gone to college, had a baby, and tried to serve in our church. We have fought and learned how to disagree without cutting each other down or losing our temper... most of the time. We have had times of distance and times of closeness, but we have always made our marriage a priority and worked to stay connected to each other. We have learned that we will never have marriage figured out, but it will always be a work in progress.
I feel so blessed to be married to this man. I have known Jacob for nearly half of my life, and he has walked with me through the majority of the difficulties in my life. He has listened to me rage and cry. We have laughed so hard that I have snorted... and then laughed some more. We have years of shared history. He is genuinely one of the most serving and selfless men I have ever met. He is nerdy beyond all belief (He owns the Zelda sound track and can tell you which area in the game each song belongs to and what items can be found there). He is a deep thinker. He is affectionate and kind. But most importantly, we share a pursuit of godliness and a passion to grow in our faith. When one of us is broken, the other finds the strength to guide us to the love of God. I cannot imagine going through student teaching or my sister's diagnosis without his support.
So I would like to share a few (fairly obvious) things we have learned over the past 5 years.
- You cannot go into marriage with an exit strategy. If quitting is an option in your mind before marriage then at some point when life is kicking you while you are down then leaving will start to look awfully appealing.
- Pride has no place is a marriage. Marriage has shown me that I am often wrong and that my selfishness hurts others. When I allow pride into my life then being "right" and "winning" the fight become my priority.
- Love isn't only a feeling. Some days you wake up grumpy and you just don't feel it. At that point you have to choose to act in a loving manner.
- The joys of marriage are worth working through the difficult times. I have experienced so much joy from our marriage. I love Jacob and I love the family we have together. I love spending time with him and having someone to share my life with. he is my encouragement and my ministry partner. He is my best friend and the person I can share my heart with. I thank God that He has allowed me to have Jacob in my life.